Washing clothes in one such example. Here we have to wash everything by hand, though I don’t really mind, I find it therapeautical. The hardest part, however, is to forecast when it’s not going to rain, so we’ll actually be able to dry those clothes after we wash them. :)
Then there’s other chores. Such as duplicating keys.
In India the process is a bit messy... but only because I’m white.
I needed to duplicate six keys. So yesterday, after work, I told myself:
OK Vio. You are going to take responsibility and duplicate those keys!!!!
So I asked my colleagues where to go and they assured me it was a simple process. All I had to do was to go to KR Market and I would find the keycutters cutting keys in the street.
Sounded easy.
So I left, feeling happy I was taking responsibility and I was finally going to get the keys duplicated.
Off I went to KR Market. After a senseless, albeit common, argument with the rickshaw driver when he tried to overcharge me, I finally found KR Market.
Imagine. A Maltese market with a difference. A place where no white people ever set foot in, except for one crazy Maltese (click *hyperlink* here to know what MALTA means) who decided she wanted to get some keys done.
I believe in asking for directions. I now, however, firmly insist to such believers to convert to map-reading.
I asked some people where I could find a keycutter. After several stares and some complicated sign language (on their part and on mine respectively) I finally understood I had to go straight, find traffic lights, and then go left.
OK, let’s go.
There were no traffic lights.
So I found a young woman who forwarded my request to her elder brother, who then forwarded my request to a policeman.
Good, I thought. He should be reliable.
Right?
Wrong.
He told me to walk back and go right.
I will not burden you any longer with the details of the time I spent going around in circles.
Two morals in this story.
1. Indian bureaucracy is everywhere.
and
2. Never ask for directions in India.
Anyway.
I finally managed to strike gold in the form of a policeman who actually knew what I was saying... and led me to the right street... with three (!!!) keycutters.
I paused at the beginning of the street, took a deep breath, and took my first step.
The battle had begun.
Bring it on, I whispered.
I’m currently reading an amazing book called Eat, Pray, Love by Liz Gilbert. The author insists that each city has a word related to it. Rome is SEX. New York is SUCCESS. Naples is FOOD.
I decided Bangalore is BARGAINING.
Definitely bargaining.
So I approached the first keycutter. My colleagues assured me a duplicate key would set me back 15 Rupees.
I presented my opponent with the key.
How much? I demanded.
300 Rupees madam, good quality!!!
(mum, do not read this part please :) )
It’s funny how English does not have colourful swearwords like Maltese, so I decided to resort to my mothertongue to express my feelings.
(you can continue reading now :) )
I managed to bring the price down to 200 Rupees, wasn’t satisfied and moved on to the next two keycutters.
After endless and useless back-and-forth bargaining, I left with nothing. No one wanted to lower the price and I refuse to settle for a price which insults my intelligence. (I dare you to comment or cough now.)
Anyway. So I ran out of the market, chased by a woman who was screaming ‘WHO ARE YOU?’ at the top of her lungs and smiling at the same time (it is possible, apparently). I stopped to catch my breath when her voice sounded distant.
(When I looked back I saw three men restraining her.)
Phew
No keys
What a completely pointless waste of time.
I called out a rickshaw to go home. The driver overcharged me, but honestly, I did not have the motivation nor the energy to even complain.
I finally got home, and cursed my white skin for the first time in my life.
But as my landlord said after I told him what happened, at least you have more to write for the blog!!
Bangalore... The city of bargainers.